666 Flags
Amusement Park

Hells own theme park featuring a wide variety
of rides that will scare the bejesus out of you
along with many gift shops and refreshment stands.
If you're feeling brave, come on down to 666 Flags.
You'll have one HELL of a time!

Admission is FREE! No money needed.
We'll make a deal!


A Wing & No Prayer

Jump aboard a 25 foot long demon eagle and hold on tight. This bad birdie will reach speeds of up to 100 MPH while giving you the grand tour of 666 Flags. From high above the brimstone you can see everything the park has to offer including Hells Bells, The Torture Pit, The Philadelphia Suburbs and The Magic Palace. (The Magic Palace was formerly The Magic Kingdom till Head Demon Disney borrowed it.) This ride is a great way to see the entire park while revisiting the wonderful lunch you had at one of our fine eateries. Rides depart every 6 minutes.

Mace Mountain

Hells version of Space Mountain. Climb into a cart and prepare yourself for one HELL of a ride. You'll be rocketed through tunnels and pasageways that are exactly like those in Space Mountain, with one exception. Mace Mountain adds real maces to the ride. Duck, bob and weave through the tunnels trying to avoid these giant spiked balls of death. Don't be fooled by other parks that say they have "real devices of torture". Mace Mountain incorporates maces made of steel, iron and brass for the only true feeling of near death experience. Try it for yourself. It's a Smashing good time!


Pin The Tail On The Minotaure

A great game for kids and parents alike. Try to pin the tail on the Minotaure
while avoiding his razor sharp horns and lightning fast charges.

Beat The Bishop

The kids will love whacking these pompus hypocrites with a variety of sticks, canes and clubs.
Smack, bash and kick the portly pontiffs into a coma and you win a prize of your choice.



It's surprising how many people don't know that McDonnalds is actually based in HELL.
Alot of people think that Ron's hair is red by coinsidance.
Come and see where it all started.

Barny's Bakery

Everyones favorite purple friend has returned to HELL to whip up some old favorites.
Try the only Angels Food Cake made with real angels.
Dozens of damningly delightful delicacies await you.
Since frozen food isn't a concern you can rest assured that everything is
made from old scratch.

Look into the crystal ball for a sneak peek
of what 666 Flags has to offer.

All this and more is waiting for you.
Come to 666 Flags and have a devilishly good time!